Words That Beautifully Stain

The loneliness here is palpable and painted with a beautiful veneer of elegant words and desires.

I read them, often. All your longing for tenderness and empathy, for connectedness and intimacy, for touch and bliss. You use these pages as catharsis, just as I do. A place to empty an already seemingly empty vessel. It isn’t empty is it? It overflows with love and dreams and misty visions of sultry moments not yet lived. The wanting fills you to capacity, the solitude or distance or lack of anything more than surface, is a burden that we carry in our own ways.

We write. We flirt. We may even invite strangers into our beds. We self-medicate with all manner of poor choices and wrong turns. It’s a chronic ache, a hole that nothing, no matter how self-destructive we become, we can’t seem to fill. So…we write.

We find ourselves drawn back to the keyboard, opening locked doors of our heart, our soul, our sexuality, our fantasy…in a desperate attempt to soothe the beasts and demons and ghosts that haunt us.

We share our words with another like we are posting flyers looking for something lost. Have you found this? What I have lost that was so dear, so full of magic and wonder? If you keep an eye out for mine, I will surely be on the lookout for yours. We show one another our scars and our deepest pain, us strangers, us tribe members of the page. We explore the taboo and the trivial, we unleash our terrible monsters here and we bathe in the sheer joy of commonality of the uncommon.

When I read your words, I have been moved, amused, heartbroken, aroused…sometimes to the point of astonishment at how you can pour your seduction of the world into a few choice sentences. I have felt empathy for your losses, seen the reflection of similar pain, felt an intimacy that I have not felt anywhere but here. Anonymity, the greatest of all truth serums. I have spilled blood in my words, I know you have as well…I feel you when I read you.

We may or may not ever find, in any tactile sense, everything we are longing for in life, but I know this. This exploration of our souls, shared through these pages, have provided us some added insight into just what we are seeking in particular. We are finding ourselves, sharing ourselves, leaving ourselves open and flayed in the comfort of facades and witty screen names and painfully honest stories and wicked, well constructed banter in our comment threads.

We, all of us who congregate here, who share our words with one another, are now connected…at least in some small, yet powerful way. We are typing words that beautifully stain each others hearts.

We write.

4 thoughts on “Words That Beautifully Stain

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